Fuck Everyone: What I Have Learned About my Anger
Here’s one reason why I struggle with it.
I was a happy child that loved to make everyone in the room laugh. During my angsty teen years, however, I developed early-onset “grumpy old man” syndrome that never left. I got angry at the slightest of things. Everyone in my house was, and still is, attuned to the sound of my irritated sigh and what it used to indicate.
Worse, when I searched for help, when I began seriously looking in to personal growth and development, all the answers seemed to blame ME. They want ME to do the work and accept the responsibility. They didn’t confirm my personal opinion that it’s all the assholes around me pissing me off!
This was untenable. I was still angry and no answers were being provided. Not good.
I began to search for reasons why this might be the case. Why the ‘path to happiness’ angered me just as much as everything (and everyone) around me did. I truly wanted to be free from my anger, in the sense that I wanted to control it and not the other way ‘round, so I left no stone unturned.
Digging through my baggage turned out to be the right choice.
From this search, I found one of the causes of my anger towards personal development was in my upbringing. It was in the way my primary caregiver, my…